2017 Goal Review
The year isn't over yet, but I've already begun planning my 2018 goals. I love goals, there's something that fulfills the "listmaker" inside me when I sit down and write out everything I'm working towards.
This time last year I felt kind of lost and decided to anchor myself to my goals thinking if I could accomplish these things I'd find myself and be happy again. Well it turns out happiness was a little more complicated. It usually is, isn't it?
I set out to accomplish the following in 12 months:
- Hit goal weight
- Pay off debt
- Buy a house
- Find future husband
- Advance my career
- Seek adventures big and small
No big deal, right? Mmm. In hindsight maybe a LOT to tackle in 1 yr! So ,how'd I do?
In December 2016 I weighed 360 and was $30k in credit card debt (having already paid $20k off beginning March 2016). I was in a job where I worked remotely 24/7 and I really hated it (both the alone environment and my actual work, just overall not a good fit). I thought my future husband was waiting on the end of checklist and I figured I could pursue all these tasks while also having tons of adventures AND buying a house. Mmmm a bit too lofty, turns out.
I wasn't transparent about this on the blog but I hit a serious wall in the early spring > late summer. I hated my job, my weight loss slowed to a trickle, dating was full of disappointments and I found myself pretty miserable. Looking back it was the biggest setback I'd faced in the last few years - I was just stuck.
Thankfully in September I started a new job, spent more time with people who got me reinvigorated about life and goals and now I'm ending the year on a great note! I love my job (huzzah!), I'm currently weighing in at 265-269 depending on the day and on December 15th I'll make my last credit card payment. WHAT!!! So exciting! It really feels surreal to be here.
However….. I didn't hit all my goals. In fact, I actually failed myself by Sam standards. But, I don't feel like a failure AT ALL! Okay fine, I did feel like a failure until I got a few TeamSam pep talks about how you measure success, LOL.
Am I at my goal weight? Nope. In fact I'm still about 100/120 pounds away from where I think I want to land. However, I'm strong as hell (thank you heavy lifting!!), I have the best relationship with food I've ever had and I truly learned to feel my feelings instead of eating them. It's taken years to master this!
Did I buy a house? Negative. Paying off debt took the forefront to saving so I still have a ways to go. I did look at a ton of houses in my price range though so I have a great basis for comparison!
Did I have any big adventures? Sadly both vacations I planned fell through and adventuring did not happen. I went on small adventures like weddings, concerts, new restaurants and new beaches and house parties and cooking for friends. I also learned how to find the adventure in learning something new, like testing new recipes or building new friendships. I learned how to be myself- funny and sarcastic and bubbly without being too transparent or worse, fake.
Did I find my future husband? Not yet, but I will say I've further refined what I NEED in a partner versus what I'd LIKE. I also found that sometimes perfect on paper does not guarantee something so essential like chemistry. I'm confident that my person is out there, somewhere, hopefully improving himself so we're both the best we can be when we find each other. Sometimes I get crazy and upset that I'm 35 and not married with a house, working on kiddos and a doggo…. Then I breathe and I think how much worse it would be if I had settled down (settled) for someone less than wonderful. I'll be happy with where I am, even if it's not where I want to be yet.
So was 2017 a total failure? Far from it. I learned so many lessons and I feel like I continued to further refine who I am and what I want from life.
So what am I doing in 2018???
- Saving and planning for my first home!! I plan to buy my first house in 2018 so I need to continue saving and be open to what the real estate gods deliver.
- Taking a few - much-needed vacations! Actual weeks away, long weekends,, road trips - I'm all in this year!
- Embracing the best Sam I can be - exercising, hitting my macros, iterating when I hit snags and not giving up. I don't necessarily need to a number or a size but I do need to feel like I am the healthiest and happiest version of myself I can be.
- Continuing to believe in love - romantic, familial, friendly ~ 2018 will be the year of LOVE!
- Leaning in. Sometimes I hold back on letting myself come apart or tell someone I miss them or celebrating a little victory. This year I will lean in - all the way. I might strike out, but I also might get a homerun. Also that's the most sporty analogy I've ever made and I'm proud of myself.
Wish me luck in my goal digging!
What are you tackling in 2018?